Saturday, February 25, 2012


   Well I took the test and failed. I studied my ass off for this test. Even took a special class for it. And the end result is the same. Done with that chapter in my life. I knew I was not going to be able to do other kind of work outside of physical work. See the thing is I know my limits, learned to expect them a long time ago. I know how smart I am. But everyone else, friends and family, all kept say,"Oh you got this, believe in yourself, we do. We know you can do it!" I knew better to buy into that crap, but I still did. I got myself all pumped up, thinking, yeah I do got this shit.

    How dumb I am for that. The first time I failed the test I knew it was cause I was not suppose to be doing that job. Granite it was a bad week and I really did not get a chance to study. I bought into all the hype everyone was throwing at me. So what do I do? I go and sign up for the test again. And this time drive over a hour out of the city I live in to pay $50 for a class that is suppose to help you pass the test, no problem. And after the class, I studied for over two months till the test.
   Well I wont be spending another $90 to take that test again. It would be my last chance since you can only take that test three times. I just need to stick with what I know, and no listen to everyone's hype. Who knows me better then me? That's right, nobody. Failing again is no ones fault but mine, I take the blame for that. I just don't know what makes me more upset, failing the test, or buying into the hype and having to fail to see that I need to just listen to me.

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